When children come over “all shy” then that’s considered cute but when you do this as you get older, it’s more of a problem. Here are some tips for overcoming your self consciousness to help you start being more normal (sorry!) when you’re out and about.
Start by taking a step back from yourself and working out what exactly you’re worried about. It could be your looks, the way you speak, the body language signals you give off. Whatever it is that’s causing you to be over-conscious of yourself, that’s fine. We’ll work on that. For the moment, just take a few seconds to think about what it is – your first thoughts are almost always correct here as it’s your subconscious bubbling up before your conscious mind has a chance to butt in and correct them.
Next, do a quick analysis of these thoughts. Chances are that you’re trying to please other people or fit into a group. Now take a few moments to decide whether that’s really for the best. Would everything go pear shaped if you were yourself with these people? Or do they already know what you’re like and would be perfectly happy for you to be your normal self anyway? Actors act, real people rarely geta away with acting for any length of time – we haven’t got a script to follow which makes keeping everything consistent quite a struggle.
Being yourself more often will tame your self consciousness almost automatically. If you’re not having to spend so much time putting on a mask then you can concentrate on being the real you. Of course this presupposes that you’ve actually plucked up the courage to join in with a group of people in the first place.
Sometimes our worries about ourselves mean that we make every effort to avoid those awkward social situations in the first place. If that’s the case, you need to make an effort to join in. What’s the worst that could happen? It’s unlikely that the group that you join in with will constantly pick on you. Deep down, most of them are probably at least as worried about what other people think about them as you are. They just don’t show it as readily. So go in and mix! Talk it through with a trusted friend first. Maybe even introduce yourself as being nervous – that’s actually a great ice breaker and other people will generally be more sympathetic to you just because you’ve had the courage to admit this.
Changing your expectations can also be a good way to disarm your self consciousness. So often, what we focus on comes to pass. So if instead of focussing on the things that make you self conscious you change the pattern then that can change the whole dynamic. Usually for the better.
Another option is to use hypnosis to gradually turn round the way your mind is thinking. Play a hypnosis download to yourself every day for a week and you’ll notice the subtle (and not so subtle) shifts in the way you react. It’s quick and easy to do. It’s also something that only you will know is happening until you unleash your new, more confident, self on the world.